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Budget Constraints: Update (Running Tally)

All quantities are at 11:59 pm of day mentioned. Trip is September 22nd-October 24th.

Day 1 (Newark, NJ)– Thursday, September 22, 2011: $3300 USD, 31 condoms, 9 cities to visit

Day 5 (Budapest, Hungary) — Monday, September 26, 2011: $3200 USD, 17 Czech Koruna (CZK), 28 condoms, 8 cities to visit, Flags: Czech Republic

Day 6 (Budapest, Hungary) — Tuesday, September 27, 2011: $3100 USD, 17 Czech Koruna (CZK), 17870 Hungarian Forint (HUF), 28 condoms, 8 cities to visit, Flags, Czech Republic

Day 8 (Budapest, Hungary) — Thursday, September 29, 2011: $3100 USD, 17 Czech Koruna (CZK), 6985 Hungarian Forint (HUF), 25 condoms, 8 cities to visit, Flags: Czech Republic, Canada, Hungary

Day ??? [Whatever Oct. 20 is from Sept. 22] (Stockholm, Sweden) — Thursday, October 20, 2011: $2100 USD, 17 Czech Koruna (CZK), 290 Swedish Krona (SEK), 18 condoms, 1.5 cities to visit, Flags: Czech Republic, Canada, Hungary, Latvia

Your Own Single Guy Guide: Tallink Silja Cruise Line

Disclaimer: This will be a feature that will continue throughout the length of my stays in places. Since literally every place as a walking tour/tourist guide, I am morphing that idea into things about the city that you really want to see. I figure that since I’m a pretty good gauge on what people are into and whatnot, this would be a good way to do an unbiased infomercial on a city that perhaps you haven’t seen and would like to know about. I will not pull punches, if I liked a place — I’ll sing its praises. If I hated, I’ll tear it the biggest asshole on the planet. Because I know assholes: I am one.

Take these as you will because I’m speaking only from my perspective. And remember: opinions are like assholes, everybody has one and only mine matters.

Tallink Silja Cruise Line from Tallinn to Stockholm

One-word definition: Piss

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Your Own Single Guy Guide: Tallinn, Estonia

Disclaimer: This will be a feature that will continue throughout the length of my stays in places. Since literally every place as a walking tour/tourist guide, I am morphing that idea into things about the city that you really want to see. I figure that since I’m a pretty good gauge on what people are into and whatnot, this would be a good way to do an unbiased infomercial on a city that perhaps you haven’t seen and would like to know about. I will not pull punches, if I liked a place — I’ll sing its praises. If I hated, I’ll tear it the biggest asshole on the planet. Because I know assholes: I am one.

Take these as you will because I’m speaking only from my perspective. And remember: opinions are like assholes, everybody has one and only mine matters.

Tallinn, Estonia

One-word definition: Talented Continue reading

After Midnight, Tallink Lets It All Hang Out (For Free)

The cruise is awful… but the porn flows at midnight — for free… from midnight to 6 am. But that is seven hours, folks, because it’s local time: starting on Tallinn time and then losing an hour for the time difference. So it’s like a free extra hour of free porn!

So when I inevitably wake up at 2 am, 4 am, and 6 am because of the rocking of the waves, I can see some additional pounding to make me go back to sleep. Free porn on a ship? That has to be awful old school porn.

 

Your Own Single Guy Guide: Riga, Latvia

Disclaimer: This will be a feature that will continue throughout the length of my stays in places. Since literally every place as a walking tour/tourist guide, I am morphing that idea into things about the city that you really want to see. I figure that since I’m a pretty good gauge on what people are into and whatnot, this would be a good way to do an unbiased infomercial on a city that perhaps you haven’t seen and would like to know about. I will not pull punches, if I liked a place — I’ll sing its praises. If I hated, I’ll tear it the biggest asshole on the planet. Because I know assholes: I am one.

Take these as you will because I’m speaking only from my perspective. And remember: opinions are like assholes, everybody has one and only mine matters.

Riga, Latvia

One-word definition: Gifted

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Excuse me, yeah, hi, I’m with the band

So I have been slacking and haven’t been updating the world of my travels like I should… but there is good reason — Tallinn’s nightlife.

Truth is, it makes Vegas look like a fucking bike ride. I have never seen more people in a little town party harder, longer and stronger than anywhere else. Until I came to Tallinn.

Bars close “early” at 2 am — then you go to another bar that closes at 4 am then another one that closes at 6 am. It’s like a treasure hunt of liver poisoning.

Regardless, I’ll tell you all about the Tallinn nightlife in a separate posting… because, well, it deserves it.

This post, however, will be about my Almost Famous moment.

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Your Own Single Guy Guide: Kiev, Ukraine

Disclaimer: This will be a feature that will continue throughout the length of my stays in places. Since literally every place as a walking tour/tourist guide, I am morphing that idea into things about the city that you really want to see. I figure that since I’m a pretty good gauge on what people are into and whatnot, this would be a good way to do an unbiased infomercial on a city that perhaps you haven’t seen and would like to know about. I will not pull punches, if I liked a place — I’ll sing its praises. If I hated, I’ll tear it the biggest asshole on the planet. Because I know assholes: I am one.

Take these as you will because I’m speaking only from my perspective. And remember: opinions are like assholes, everybody has one and only mine matters.

Kiev, Ukraine

One-word definition: Sextacular

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Sharing the Arts: Traditional Dances from Around the World

This is what I love about Europe — the beliefs in the arts….

Ukraine

Latvia

Czech Republic

Poland

Who Knows… but not Europe

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/e/16711680/wshhTFM3iHEm8xEUmerY

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